Mid-Monday Rant | Complaining About the Complainers

Purple Abstract Art By Chandra2

I’m annoyed.

I woke up this morning. Annoyed. I couldn’t shake it and I know why. Just before I went to bed last night a friend sent a link directing me to a Facebook post. In the post the person registered shock about a situation that can change. Not the problem. However, instead of offering consolation or solutions, most of the people complained and added to complaints.

I heard more complaints this morning. “Why isn’t ‘it’ this way?” “Why isn’t ‘it’ that way?” “This is the worst…” Complaints. Complaints. Complaints. 

Sometimes we complain to register our frustration over a situation we can do little to change. I get it. I complain sometimes too, but my gosh. It seems all I hear lately are complaints—and because so much of our lives are lived through screens—the complaints are literally EVERYWHERE.

So, now I’m complaining about the complainers. 

Here’s my fundamental problem with complainers—those people who always have something to say about everything—they’re always talking but not doing. 

If we see a problem, don’t we work toward solving it?

If you need money to pay bills, do you talk on the phone all day about the overdue bills? Or do you get off your duff and find a[nother] job or other ways to take care of the bills? If your house is untidy, do you sit around watching television all day and complain about the mess? Or do you pick up a broom or a mop and begin to put things in order? If students can’t afford tuition at a private university, do you expect the institution to let them attend without paying? Or do you donate? Start a scholarship fund? Fundraise? Do you post negativity all over social media or do you use all that energy to make a positive difference?

We can complain about the pile of work we have yet to do or we can shut up and get it done. Nobody’s going to write the book for us, complete reports, or mow the overgrown lawn. We can complain all day, but the pile will be there…until we take action. 

If our mouths are running, but we’re not doing anything about the problem, we’re just complaining. And that makes us part of the problem. 

Note: I am so sorry if you fell into my rant by accident. I would have provided a disclaimer, but the title serves that purpose.

The Ides of March | 3 Lessons from Caesar

Purple Abstract Art By ChandraI’m dropping in to share a light-hearted warmup poem I scribbled in my journal this morning as I watched little birdies forage for their morning meal in our rain-soaked backyard.

The Ides of March
Chandra Tyler Mountain

On this day Julius Caesar
was betrayed by friend turned foe.
The lessons in Caesar’s demise are three:
Listen to your wife.
Watch your back.
Beware the Ides of March.

This has been a hard, hard week for reasons I don’t have the capacity to recount. Writing these few lines provided a nice break from things that require deep reflection and intense emotions. Perhaps, I’ll work it into a more serious poem one day.

The abstract art (above) has nothing to do with the poem. It started as doodled flowers. 😀

Have a restful weekend…

Forthcoming Collection: Sacred Water

Cover Art: Dennis A. Tyler

Sacred water falls
on me, bathing me in light,
quenching every thirst.
haiku © Chandra Tyler Mountain

You know those haiku I write every morning? Well, I’ve compiled 100 of them into a book, Sacred Water: Scripture Haiku for Those Who Thirst. That collection is now available for preorder on Amazon (ebook). If purchased, the book will deliver to your device automatically Sunday, May 12, 2024 (Mother’s Day!). The paperback comes out in May too!

Sacred Water features a collection of 100 haiku inspired by various verses from The Holy Bible. Each 3-line poem is paired with my photography and photo art.

Interested in preordering? Here’s the link: Sacred Water. Thank you!

By the way, the gorgeous photo featured on the book cover is the work of my big brother Dennis. Be sure to check out his work: Dennis Tyler Photography.

Later, folks!

Creative Gathering | Order out of Chaos with Neurographic Art

page0Students and faculty are on break, but some of us are still trapped in meetings and catchup work. I’m not bitter though. I am grateful for my camera, pens, coloring pencils, and sketchpad that allow me to escape the world of busy-busy if only for a few minutes here and there.

I, again, participated in Sheila D’s 30-day Creative Gathering, but because of other pursuits, I did not commit to creating art every day for 30 days straight. Instead, I committed to two pieces per week (and threw in an extra for Leap Day).

I stepped way out of my comfort zone and shared nine neurographic art pieces–all featured in the collage above.

I learned about neurographic art from Martha S, one of my Wildflower sisters, who shared about it on her blog, Postcards in the Air.

Similar to Zentangles, which is another form of doodling, neurographic arts starts with a line. Rather than using patterns inside shapes as Zentangles does, you start with a thin marking pen at one edge of the paper. Once you notice the direction you are going, you change the direction and repeat that process until the line goes off the page. Artists have taken this line pattern further by rounding off each corner, adding color, and overlaying shapes on top of the line. The design can then become the background underneath a cutout shape. –Martha S., Postcards in the Air

Immediately after reading Martha’s post, I tried it for myself. I was so relaxed afterward that I knew I found another “doodling” practice to turn to when I’m feeling anxious and out-of-sorts.

[Sheila will probably bite my head off a tiny bit for saying so, but] I do not consider myself “this kind of artist,” so my decision to focus on neurographic art for the challenge surprised me. I was even more surprised when others in the “30-days” artistic community enthusiastically commended my work!

As with all my artsy endeavors, neurographic art [for me] is about the process, and I thoroughly enjoy [and recommend] the process, which “brings order out of chaos”–on the page and in my mind.

For more information on neurographic art–in addition to Martha’s post (linked above)–check out the following resources:

As always, be sure to visit Sheila’s site to view the group gallery, featuring two pieces from each artist who participated in the challenge, February 1 – March 1, 2024.

Be sure to take some time for art to day! Make some! See some! Share some!

Response to Review of In Search of a Salve

K.E. Garland, author of In Search of a Salve: Memoir of Sex Addict, wrote a response to my review of her book. Her responses are worth the read. Be sure to click the link (below). Have you read the book yet?

In Search of a Salve: A Response to Chandra’s Review

Writing, Writing, Writing | Stafford Writing Community Month One Progress Report

Poems and Blossoms

As I mentioned in a January post, I joined the Stafford Writing Challenge, which invites poets to write a poem a day for one year—from January 17, 2024 to January 16, 2025. That’s 366 poems. 

That seems like a pretty lofty goal—even one month in. So, how have I done so far? From January 17 to February 16 I wrote:

48 poems
31 haiku
13 Poems-in-progress

Not too shabby. Eh?

Writing from Monday-Thursday is easier than weekend writing. After a long week of think-think-thinking, my brain is ready to relax, so there’s usually a lot of room for improvement in the poems written Friday and Saturday, especially. I sometimes have a good Friday poem, but even the weak poems have good bones, movement, or a few good lines I can work into something worth reading. I’m thinking about taking one day off per week to let my mind rest and play in other ways. I can use that day to tweak one of the not-so-good poems or play around with form.

My subjects are rather random. A lot of my poems come from my daily interactions, conversations with friends or colleagues, and whatever comes to mind in the moment I’m in. I try not to overthink it and go with the flow.

I write haiku every morning, a practice I started last summer, so I don’t really consider them a part of the Stafford challenge.

I write by hand in a rose gold journal my friend Julie gave me two years ago. It is beautiful with gilded pages, too nice to use for work notes. Now I am dealing with the daunting task of typing all those poems! Ugh! Oh, I also record myself reading many of them just to hear how they sound–make sure the rhythm, cadence and word selection work.

The good news is I wouldn’t be embarrassed about sharing 90% of the poems I wrote the first month of the challenge.

That’s how I feel today. Let’s see how I feel a year from now. 😉

If you’re interested, here’s a list of the (non-haiku) poems I wrote the first 30 days of the challenge. Titles are subject to change. The list is more for me than you, so you won’t miss out on anything if you skip it. 😀

  1. (Not an) Ordinary Dude
  2. Snow Day
  3. Falcon
  4. Presence
  5. Abraham Slept
  6. Some Days (the Words Won’t Come Easy)
  7. Sad Movies
  8. 63 Years
  9. Mama Hurts
  10. One Thing I’ve Learned
  11. #MeToo
  12. Always Anger
  13. The Scenic Route (or, the Long Way Home)
  14. When There Are No Poems
  15. Prevarication
  16. A Walk Through the Rain
  17. To My Inner Child
  18. Let Yourself Be
  19. The Sweetest Sound
  20. Mama Was My First Love
  21. Chains
  22. Shift
  23. The Ocean Says to M.O.
  24. May the Words
  25. Lens
  26. My Kind of People
  27. Girl, You’re Carrying Too Much
  28. Pretty
  29. Spinning on Wheels
  30. Penance
  31. Gentle (Stars & Light)
  32. To the White Family
  33. Light Breaks
  34. Sacred Water
  35. My Heart Leaps
  36. I Weigh Myself
  37. Ars Poëtica
  38. The Burden of Knowledge
  39. The Thing with Feathers
  40. Forgive Me?
  41. Home
  42. Kisses
  43. Be Gentle
  44. Journalism 101
  45. The Kiss
  46. Rescue
  47. Place
  48. Rocks

Until next time…

A Little MO Love

Dropping in with a little MO for Love Day!

NOT ANYONE WHO SAYS
Mary Oliver (1935-2019)

Not anyone who says, “I’m going to be
careful and smart in matters of love,”
who says, “I’m going to choose slowly,”
but only those lovers who didn’t choose at all
but were, as it were, chosen
by something invisible and powerful and uncontrollable
and beautiful and possibly even
unsuitable —
only those know what I’m talking about
in this talking about love.

from Mary Oliver, Felicity: Poems

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Between Ache and Blessing

BW Sunflower4My father passed two years ago today. I needed to sit with that today, so I took the day off and gave myself over to whatever I wanted to feel.

I have been walking with this absence for two years.

Holding my breath.

Waiting.

Watching.

For what? 

Whenever I visit my mom I lie quietly in the bed where my dad slept, thinking about him and this hole in my life. His absence is palpable. There is no sound. There is no scent. There is just the gaping hollowness of his…absence. 

At times, like today, that weight is a hard and heavy ache—a yearning for something that can’t be, a gnawing, knowing ache because nothing can change the circumstance. 

But, I know I am incredibly blessed to have had my father for 86.5 years. For while I note the absence when I visit home, I also note the presence—his desk and computer where he sat baiting others into debate about politics, race, and inequality; the empty chair on the patio where he sat thinking, cigarette in hand; the beautiful letter my niece wrote to him still on display; the last gift I gave him in which I tried to capture all my love for him; the pieces of clothing my mom chose to keep taking space in the closet; the memoir he started which begins with my mom. Most notably, the person he was, the memories, and the love. 

That is where I am today—between ache and blessing. And that is the contrary nature of life on this side. It’s not one thing or the other. It’s both/and, which often creates something new.

Please don’t feel the need to comment and express condolences. I do not write for sympathy. I write because I must. Writing is a companion through grief.

Heartbreak is real for all of us—if not now, eventually. But we must find or learn healthy ways to acknowledge and walk with our grief, while holding on to joy–a miracle only God can perform.  

Kindness Is Personal

Roses in Vase

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. –Leo Buscaglia

A friend, Yvette, recently shared that she was moved to tears when two students told her she’s pretty.  It had been years since she was told she’s pretty. 

Another friend, Faith, was moved to tears in my office when she read the inscription on signed copies of [my] books I had just given her. No need to mention I threatened to kick her out of my office if she didn’t cease the waterworks. 

At first, I wondered: Are we so starved for genuine kindness that such simple gestures would elicit these strong responses? But, I realized they were not simple, everyday deeds. They were personal.

In each experience, it wasn’t the compliment or the inscription per se that evoked tears. My friends were moved because the acts weren’t random. They were intentional and personal. 

Those students let Yvette know they had been watching her—how she carries herself, her hair, and her style. She felt seen, literally. She takes time and puts effort into her appearance. She does it for herself, but it’s always nice to be noticed, especially when an individual doesn’t always feel good about herself. 

Faith felt appreciated. She is a worker bee, so people know they can count on her to get the job done. This often results in her doing far too many things for far too many people. She’s thanked, of course, but people move on until they need her for the next thing. She insisted on buying my books, but I resisted harder. She is a thoughtful person, always available to chat, commiserate, and laugh with me, and I appreciate her. I wanted her to know that I love her just for being who she is. 

We talk a lot about random acts of kindness, but let’s try some intentional acts. Tune in to the people you encounter every day. Find out what they need and then do (or give) that thing. 

Kindness always matters.