Earth Has No Sorrow…

Come, ye disconsolate, where’er ye languish;
Come to the mercy-seat, fervently kneel;
Here bring your wounded hearts, here tell your anguish,
Earth has no sorrow that heaven cannot heal.

Today marks five years since we lost my little sister, and I miss her every single day. I can’t see the color pink without thinking about her. Certain cadences in my speech and the intoning of particular expressions make my words catch in my throat because I think I hear her voice coming from my body. As I think about her life, our conversations about dreams and goals, I realize we sang the same song but to a different tune.

I tried to keep myself busy today because I know where my thoughts “live” on March 11. I tried to stuff the grief into a neat box inside my heart, when what I wanted to do and what I needed to do was to pull away from the rest of the world and cry myself tearless.

Just last night, I finished a letter to a dear friend regarding the recent brutal loss of her own sister, administering medicine that I must take. Grief doesn’t come in a neat package with step-by-step, day-by-day instructions. Grief is a process that can’t be staged, coached, cultivated, or rushed.

And we must allow ourselves to go through it–no matter how long it takes–with apologies to no one, not even ourselves.

3 thoughts on “Earth Has No Sorrow…

  1. Christine Brooks says:

    It takes time to grieve and there is no end to the memories. Keep them alive by sharing them.
    She is with you even though you can’t touch her. You are brave to share your sorrow. Know you are in my heart.

  2. Sheila Marie Delgado says:

    Hope you were able to cry at some point during the day Chandra. Hope your heart feels better today, and that the memories are bringing you a little more JOY, and a little less sorrow. Thinking of you, and sending a hug from the desert. ;/

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