See You “in the Morning,” Sister-Girl

Lori Ann by Tapman Media

My guys and I traveled to New Orleans the weekend before last–to lay eyes on and touch my sister Lori, to love on her and pray over her. Even though she could not verbally communicate with us, she was responsive. She even opened her eyes briefly. In our prayers for a mighty miracle, we also submitted to Divine Wisdom. There was so much light in her, still so much fight that we walked away, hopeful that we’d see her again the following weekend.

That was not to be.

My sister, Lori, took her last breath a few days after our return, Wednesday night, September 12, just before midnight. And now, I feel like I’m holding my own breath…again.

I am angry. Disappointed. Hurt. Grieving miserably. I wish I could sit this one out and not go through it at all. I draw parallels between Grendel, the monster of the Anglo-Saxon epic Beowulf, and cancer, a horrible night-crawler that catches us unaware and snuffs out lives. Jealous over our happiness, our relationships. Our very humanity. And that horrible beast took Lori from us, like it took Karlette five and a half years ago.

One of my nieces texted me yesterday expressing her utter disappointment and anger about Lori’s passing. We were all praying that her desperate situation could become an incredible story of Divine intervention. I assured her that I share her feelings, and encouraged her to give full vent of her anger to God. He can handle it. Furthermore, He’s well acquainted with our grief and He’s just as hurt and angry as we are that we are going through this…AGAIN.

I read and reread the following quote almost daily for several weeks and finally shared it with my mom and sister:

God didn’t set this journey in motion. He’s just as angry as you are that you have to walk this road. But He promises you this: He will walk this road with you. And He will be there for you when you reach the end of it. God loves you.  –from the television series Touched by an Angel

God is a compassionate, loving Father, cradling us and weeping with us. His amazing grace, the blessed hope of Christ’s return to take us Home, preparation for the biggest family reunion ever, and a heavenly future without the suffering and pain of illness and death rescue me from the darkest depths of despair.

I already miss Lori like crazy. She was a good person, who welcomed all into her life and loved them deeply. She loved giving gifts, finding just the right thing. Like Karlette, she loved beautifying her spaces. She spent so much time babysitting many of the nieces and nephews that we can claim she “half raised” them. Her guys and two little girls (her granddaughters) were her heart, but there was so much room for many more.

Though I grieve over the loss of her, I do so with an unshakeable hope, rooted in Christ:

Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep in him. According to the Lord’s word, we tell you that we who are still alive, who are left until the coming of the Lord, will certainly not precede those who have fallen asleep. For the Lord himself will come down from heaven, with a loud command, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet call of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first. After that, we who are still alive and are left will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. And so we will be with the Lord forever. Therefore encourage one another with these words. –I Thessalonians 4:13-18

“Lavender Tulips for Lori,” by Tapman Media

50 thoughts on “See You “in the Morning,” Sister-Girl”

  5. Dr. Ramona L. Hyman says:
    Reply

    Thanks for providing such a beautiful perspective on the results of a disease that seeks to destroy the human spirit. May you continue to walk in memory of your sisters. God is using you to help us all understand how to feel our way through the darkness. And dark cancer and death is! The light is the memory of the beloved. Thanks, Chandra. Please continue to write so that we can know how to walk through darkness–or at least feel our way until Jesus gathers us all. Blessings!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Lois Brookins says:
    Reply

    I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful sister. May you and your family be comforted in knowing she sleeps for a little while in Jesus! He is soon to come and you will see her again. Keep the faith. Sounds like she lived a great life.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. franhunne4u says:
    Reply

    I do not have words enough to take away your pain or even lessen it. Just a virtual hug. That you have to go through all of this again … At least you knew her “for a while” and have your memories still – but right now that’s just making the gap wider. I can find no words to comfort you, but I am glad that you know where to find some that do that. May you never lose this ability to take comfort in your faith.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Lona Gynt says:
    Reply

    Chandra… there is, even in your grief, so much light in your words:

    “God is a compassionate, loving Father, cradling us and weeping with us. His amazing grace, the blessed hope of Christ’s return to take us Home, preparation for the biggest family reunion ever, and a heavenly future without the suffering and pain of illness and death rescue me from the darkest depths of despair.”

    Sounds like: “her desperate situation could become an incredible story of Divine intervention.”

    But still it hurts in the here and now, hoping every possible comfort at this painful loss. Your love for her is beautiful. God Bless, Lona.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Sylvia G says:
    Reply

    Thanks for a beautiful posting. It makes one think and prayerfully respond to the love God has for all of us. Let’s keep our focus knowing that “in the morning” God will end death’s journey.

    Prayers and love to you. What else can I say, but that I understand!
    Sylvia G

    Liked by 1 person

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