I had a series of “love posts” planned for this week, but my students warned me not to write/post them because–from their youthful perspective–it might seem insensitive to those who don’t have a Valentine.
I laughed. Do people really take Valentine’s Day that seriously? No matter. I won’t risk it. 😀
Instead, I’m dropping in with a favorite postcard from my “vintage” collection of postcards, acquired when I was a teen (I think)–before email, swap-bot, and Love Notes–when my friends and I regularly sent newsy letters and postcards to each other.
This postcard, printed by Hallmark, echoes the end of today’s [class] discussion of Shakespeare’s The Taming of the Shrew: the very words used to demonstrate Petruchio’s successful “taming” of “Kate” can also be used to prove that Katherina really is the boss lady of the joint.
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I liked the Lucy card, but was saddened by your students’ comments about “bitterness and meanness of those who don’t have a Valentine.”
I am one of those who doesn’t have a Valentine. My husband, who I loved dearly, died a month ago, but I am neither bitter nor mean about Valentine’s Day or those who share their love.
I found those words truly unkind and very hurtful.
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Oh, I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your husband. Sending you a great big virtual hug. I’m also sorry you found the words offensive. I don’t think my students really meant them. In fact, that’s why I laughed. They’re just speaking out of their youthful reality–being “single” and living and walking through a college campus surrounded by a bunch of “lovers” can make them “feel some sort of way” on V-Day. But I will modify the language (paraphrase rather than quote) to minimize the offensiveness of the language. Thank you for pointing that out to me.
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Dear Chandra, what a very kind person you are, to reach out to a stranger so quickly with words of comfort and apology, not only here but also by email. I am so very grateful, and I return with love your virtual hug.
I do understand that the words were said out of youthful thoughtlessness, and not meant to offend, but sometimes we don’t think of how our words can hurt. I remember the words I read once, ‘what we see depends on what we look for’, and I am sorry for taking offense at a time when I am probably ultra-sensitive.
Perhaps your students can also learn a lesson from those words, perhaps what they see is only sadness or a feeling of being ‘inferior’, not meanness. Besides, you can share love with almost everyone and everything, starting with yourself, perhaps that is the best lesson one can learn and share for Valentine’s Day. And I did love Lucy being ‘in control’. 🙂
As for you – kindness is one of the great and most unappreciated virtues, imo, and you have it in abundance. Here’s an excerpt from a poem by my favourite poet, Mary Oliver. I hope it is ok to quote it here.
‘Belief isn’t always easy.
But this much I have learned —
if not enough else —
to live with my eyes open.
I know what everyone wants
is a miracle.
This wasn’t a miracle.
Unless, of course, kindness —
as now and again
some rare person has suggested —
is a miracle.
As surely it is.’
Mary Oliver
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Wow! You filled my heart this morning. Thank you for your wisdom and your kind words. I love Mary Oliver’s poetry and the principle/practice of “kindness,” so this is the icing on the cake. In fact, one of my posts this week will feature another poem on kindness. I would like to send you a card or postcard. If you would like that, please use the contact form and send me your address. No one else will see it. Hugs, Chandra
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Sweet. Is all I have to say. Happy Valentine Day week!
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Valentine’s** Day
(pardon the typo) And I forgot to say Snoopy and his gang are my personal favourites. Though I’m biased towards Charlie Brown more than Peggy Jean. 🙂
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V Day really has no meaning to me, given that I grew up in a country that never celebrated it. It’s something we only saw on (American) TV or movies. I hope you have a nice day.
I do love that cartoon though! It’s perfect. lol
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The Lucy card is endearing. I too am concerned about the students reaction. On one hand it’s good to be concerned about the feelings of others and to have compassion but that shouldn’t mean that the rest of the world shouldn’t be forced to go without. Sometimes a person’s circumstances just suck and sometimes circumstances suck for a reason. The trick is to figure out what adjustment yo make so that circumstances can be changed.
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No need for concern about the students’ reaction. Really. They’re okay and they’re going to be okay. But yes, we do need to pay more attention to why things suck and make adjustments when we can.
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