Sorrow | Lessons from Grief

Butterfly-2 wmLoss and grief are inevitable parts of life. We know this, but that doesn’t make it easier to manage. In fact, the inevitable is often a source of anxiety for some. Despite how ab-so-lute-ly awful it is, grief teaches us many lessons about life, love, and ourselves. Here are some of the lessons I’ve learned.

  1. Love is more powerful than we can ever find words for or even imagine. We continue loving long after the person is gone.
  2. Grief is a journey for one. Others may grieve the loss of the same person, but not the same loss. Every loss is personal and the journey to healing individual.
  3. There is no “getting over” a loss, but eventually the wound will heal. As with all wounds, there will be scars.
  4. Grief stays with us. It morphs and shape-shifts until it settles into our beings.
  5. Eventually, we learn to live with grief, but our hearts may never stop aching.
  6. The gaping, person-sized hole inside never gets filled. We miss the person for the rest of our days on earth, but mingled with the pain will be fond memories and laughter.
  7. It is important that we find space to express ourselves and talk about our loved ones.
  8. We should never apologize for grieving, even if it makes others uncomfortable.
  9. The Divine draws closer to us when we grieve (Psalm 34:18).
  10. We learn how to sit in the dark and still believe in Light.

What lessons have you learned from grief?

15 thoughts on “Sorrow | Lessons from Grief

  1. Manu says:

    Than you for sharing this Chandra. These lessons are valuable ones to remember. The second one stood out to me. I think sometimes we do not completely grasp that. But yes it is different for each individual.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Chandra Lynn says:

      Thank you for reading and for sharing. I perused your blog earlier today, and have made a note to read through the posts carefully soon. I love the little snippets I’ve read so far! Thanks for connecting!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. revruss1220 says:

    What an absolutely inspired list! Based on personal experience, I can say a loud, “YES! Amen!” to each one of these. So well and delicately put.
    And since you asked, I sometimes have likened grief to an amputation. That is, part of who I am has been chopped off and is gone forever. In that context the phrase “grieving well” doesn’t mean expecting and waiting for that amputated limb to grow back. It means saying YES to that loss and ultimately learning how to live as the one-armed (or one-legged) person you now are.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Janet from FL says:

    I am still learning about grief. I have found that grief is very different depending on who the person is to you — friend, parent, grandparent, sibling… When my favorite Grandparent died, I was in my teens and was devastated. I grieve for her still. Thank you for posting these lessons. They are helpful.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Sheila Marie Delgado says:

    Wonderful, thoughtful list Chandra. And your art today is fitting. Well, one thing that comes to mind, is how I can be doing fine, getting on with getting on. Feeling good, and then I see something, or hear something. And sometimes, I find myself bawling. And not just the on-the-surface teary eyes. But the throat clenching, deep, bawling. Grief is a constant companion. It’s just sometimes silent. xoxoxox

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Ellen Hawley says:

    I am sharply and oddly aware of being alive when I’m most grieving the dead. Beauty is both stunning and sad. But as you say, grieving is a journey for one. I hadn’t known that, but yes, when I read it, I recognize it.

    Liked by 1 person

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