Sunflowers and Kindness | The Ultimate Kindness

February 28, 2023February 28, 20239 Comments

Sheila D Sunflower

“Don’t just be good to others. Be good to yourself too.”

February has been a weird month. In fact, this whole year has been kind of strange so far. I was excited about the Kindness Week planned for Pics and Posts two weeks ago, but the “strangeness” caused me to drop the ball.

I needed all the energy to get through the days of über long meetings and random oddities. I’m coming to terms with reality—even if I can make the time, I sometimes don’t have the “vim and vigor” for anything extra.

That is the kindness I am learning to extend to myself. I’m no longer pushing myself past E(mpty) and operating on fumes. I deserve more and my loved ones deserve better.

And so do you.

Go out and do your good deeds, but remember the ultimate kindness is often to yourself. Be kind to you!

About the Image: Today’s sunflowers are from the water-color sunflower diva, Sheila D! She surprised me with these beauties about a year ago. They have been brightening up my planner, but I figure it’s time to share them with the world.

Seven Favorites from World Watercolor Month | Variegated Fritillary [Butterfly] in Blue

August 2, 2022August 2, 20226 Comments

World Water Color Month 2022, Day 27 (July 27, 2022)

I heard many beautiful statements today. Interestingly, they all focused one way or another on compassion for others. My friend Lexi posted the quote below in her Instagram/Facebook stories today, and it aligned well with discussions in our work session. Kristen Corley’s wisdom in admonishing us to extend compassion to ourselves was the icing on the cake for all I heard today.

You’ve been through a thousand things in your life people don’t even know about. You’ve experienced things that have shook you, changed you, broke you, built you and taught you to be stronger than you ever thought you had the ability to be. And you are who you are for all of it. So the next time someone judges you based on a small part of what they see and how they interpret that, remember who you are, remember how much you’ve overcome and smile and keep walking because you don’t have a single thing to prove to anyone else. You’ve already proved so much to yourself[; you] muddled through storms that people didn’t even see because of how you carried yourself. –Kirsten Corley

Happy Tuesday!

Just Being.

June 30, 2021May 4, 202310 Comments

Colleen Persimmon

Sometimes just being needs space to relax. It needs time to pause from the pressure of living up to the duties and expectations of a rigid framework, or rest from showing up in full armor every day to protect a tender internal truth.

Colleen Blueberries-2

Or sometimes just being needs to cry and feel into coarse emotions for a while.

Colleen Blackberries-2

Whatever it takes for all the layers of what has built up inside to begin to unwrap the gift you truly are, deep within, just being. —Susan Frybort

About the Images: The photographs in this post were all shot a few days ago in a moment of “just being.” The ripening persimmon, blueberries, and blackberries are just a few of the treats growing in Colleen’s garden–recently renamed [by me] “Colleen’s Private Farm and Botanical Garden.” Her father spends time in this garden planting and cultivating and just being–a reminder of the beauty that can be produced when we create space to just be.

Coping with the Madness of 2020: Shut It Down!

October 31, 2020November 2, 202019 Comments

Grainy Black and White: Fallen Magnolia Leaves

Plans for my “Coping with 2020” series were slightly derailed because, as one of my former students put it, this week was “ugly.” There’s no other way to put it. I worked 14-19 hour days almost every day this week. COVID-19 numbers rose daily. Zeta knocked down trees and power in NOLA and other places. And it seemed the whole world expressed anxiety about what we might wake up to November 4. By Thursday, I was livid because there was no relief from the noise.

One part of 2020’s madness for me is too much doing, too much noise all the time. Everywhere we turn. Noise. Someone or something telling us what to do, how to do it, how to think. Noise. Piling up our plates. Vying for control of our time and energy. Noise. Noise we seemingly can’t escape because doom and Zoom are everywhere.

Grainy Black and White: Impatiens

So how do I cope? I shut it down. Everything. Computers. Phone. All of it. And I sit, drive, or walk in total silence.

I’ve always loved the early morning and late night quiet and the rare but not impossible moment of respite from the daily noise in the middle of the day. But silence is different. We can always find quiet. Silence, ever-present and always within reach, seeks us, but we have to be intentional about being found.

Silence. When there are too many words and too much doing. Silence. When it’s easy to grab the phone and chat away whatever spare moments we can find. Silence. When we can put in our earbuds and tune out the world through music and podcasts. Silence. When the world is loud and boisterous and simply too much.

Grainy Black and White: Begonias

So this week—in the middle of the umpteenth multitasking Zoom meeting, just after the department’s student assistant knocked with one more issue she couldn’t address—I hit mute, closed my eyes and sat in silence.

I’m sure I was on the brink of screaming, “uncle!” That moment in the midst of the chaos saved my sanity.

When the world feels like too much—get off social media, turn off the tv, turn off all screens, ignore the phone and all the doing, and hit mute.

There is freedom and calm right in the middle of the silence.

Grainy Black and White: Magnolia Pods

Self-Kindness and the (Un)Written Plan

January 1, 2020January 1, 20206 Comments

Interior of the Grand Hyatt Hotel in Washington, DC. Digitally altered, of course.

The publicly announced commitments to change and other goals [seem to] have increased significantly for 2020, perhaps, because most perceive the new year as the beginning rather than the end of a decade.

This morning, I had a brief discussion with Paula, an inspirational writer friend, following her (re)posting of a devotional thought she wrote at the beginning of 2018. She commented in our discussion that not much had changed in two years.

That gave me pause for two reasons: (1) From my point of view Paula has made serious strides in recent years. And (2) when I considered what I’d hoped to accomplish the past several years, I confronted the reality that I missed the mark many times, in many ways.

But before I allowed myself to sit in a stew of self-pity and regret, I decided to make a list of all the things I have accomplished over the decade. Sufficiently sated, I stopped at the end of the first long page–with plans to “complete” the list and refer to it whenever feelings of failure and defeat surface.

While writing the list, I focused on the things others can see, things I can list on my curriculum vitae or include in a professional biography. However, there are so many victories, so many successes that would not be included on a CV or in a bio.

By the grace of God, I’ve done some hard things, faced and overcome difficult obstacles. Things that took time. Energy. And left scars. Things no one else will see. Things most will never know. Things for which I will never be publicly honored, recognized, or applauded. Things that firmed up my soul and impacted the lives of others in ways I may never know.

I learned long ago my value does not come from a list of successes (or failures), a title, a bank account, or even the people around me. I also learned what I achieve through and for the Most High is far more critical than anything I do for myself.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s important to make plans and act on them, but I invite you to do so with a little more perspective and self-kindness. Even if you don’t check everything off [the probably overly ambitious] list within the time frame expected, take into consideration the ways in which you slay and conquer that aren’t written into the plan.